Asian guy waiting for a burrito…
There really is no easy way to say “goodbye” to all 3 of our loyal readers. Actually, I would not be even writing a goodbye post, if not for the amazing readers of this blog. I feel I owe a bit in the way of an explanation to them. For those of you who stumbled across this humble blog looking for more quotes from The Sound of Music, you can haz all the lulz.
I truly wish I could say that I am taking a hiatus from blogging to write the next great American novel, publish my memoirs, or finally start work on that planetary physics PhD, but I am simply taking one, because I need a break. Note: I’m also perpetually lazy and a procrastinator, but that’s neither here nor there. I’m no Randy Pauch, and I cannot truthfully begin this by explaining that I have an engineering problem. I have no grand designs for making this the platform for launching myself into the next phase of life (or the afterlife).
Instead, I simply have a motivation problem. I’m not motivated enough to have an ulterior motive. Such an underhanded and devious move would require planning, and that takes energy. If I had that kind of energy, I wouldn’t be writing this mindless, self-involved drivel. No, I’m giving myself a much needed timeout.
I’ll be contributing to at least a few more United Cardinal Bloggers projects and an awards prediction post, and then I’m off like a prom dress.
Before I go into my corner and put on the cone of shame, I’d like to say “thanks” to a few people.
- Many thanks to Nick (@pitchershit8th) for taking a chance on a guy who started his blogging by writing “Why I’m Not A Baseball Blogger“.
- Thanks to Josh (@aprfool79) for putting up with my monthly rants about how much the Cardinals resembled a dead man walking.
- “Thank you” to my wife, Lisa, who put up with me writing no fewer than 20 posts a month about the sport I hold near and dear to my heart. She’s been a blogging widow for far too long.
- Big double back tap chest bump bro hug to Bill Ivie and Daniel Shoptaw for encouraging me to be the same jerk in writing that I am in real life. They put up with the guy claiming that the emperor was wearing no clothes when in fact the emperor was nowhere to be seen. I’m that guy.
- Hat tip to Bob Netherton for being ridiculously supportive of my work and overly generous in his assessments.
Finally, I leave you all with a few bits of tid to remind you of why you won’t really miss me writing in this space.
- The “God particle” was actually discovered years and years ago and used to make the original Spork of Power. Like Zeus’s lightning bolt, it beget all other sporks.
- Shoving an 8 pound burrito down your pie hole will never not be cool to me, and I reminded people incessantly about this in various ways. The next time you encounter a burrito of great largeness, you will think of me. You’re welcome in advance.
- No matter how hard you try to change life, you will never change the fact that All Your Bad Trade Ideas Are Belong To Us. Don’t even bother.
- I’m responsible for putting TLR in “The King’s Speech”, showing Joe Kelly frolicking on Mars, giving Allen Craig a unicorn, and combining Mat Latos and Tim Lincecum in the “Anti-Social Network“.
- I also gave the world the #MVPee hashtag to make fun of Ryan Braun and his enormous bulbous eyes.
- In more serious moments, I wrote the “Breaking Bad”, “Devil’s Advocate”, and “Hump Day Polls” (okay, so maybe not that serious).
- If you were paying close attention, I wrote “No Sacred Cows” the day before I wrote “Moo-he-cah”. Maybe nobody caught that one, but I sure got a man giggle out of it.
- Much to my own surprise I found time to raise awareness about several worthwhile charity events – most notably of which was the STARS 4 Baby Reesa event hosted by Skip Schumaker and the folks at Sunrise UMC. I wrote from the heart about Darryl Kile, Jack Buck, and growing up listening to baseball games on my grandparent’s sun porch.
- I brought both the funny and the truth when discussing PED use, baseball etiquette, and HoF candidacies.
- Finally, I can honestly say that I’m really proud of the research and time put into predicting Gold Glove award winners, discussing playoff matchups, and making appearances on podcasts (granted, I never appeared on the PH8 podcast).
When I look at everything I’ve written as a body of work, I can say that I wish I had been better, written more coherently, and ignored everything anybody every wrote or said about the content I had at least a hand in generating. Then again, all of the negatives are miniscule compared to my increased appreciation for the game, the men who play it, and the people who dedicate time to reading and writing about it. It is for that last group that I hold the greatest sense of appreciation.
When I started writing here, I never expected more than a few dozen people to regularly read what I wrote, and I was quite content with that. The fact that thousands of people stopped by at least a few times still humbles and shocks me. Maybe once I’ve had some time to eat more foods using a spork, I’ll come to my senses and return to blogging. Before that happens, I’m packing my toys and leaving the PH8 sandbox in a few weeks.
-Dennis
